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Ode to Ivan
(with apologies to Poe and Kipling)
By Martin Graw
O nce upon a midnight windy
While pine trees were getting bendy
Ivan came, with name so trendy
Ripping houses from the shore.
With tides the worst in modern lore,
Send us Ivan, nevermore
Suddenly, we lost our cable
Electric lights were failed, unable
Massive coast destruction, no fairy fable
Beacher floating, on his door
Like what hit DeLuna years before,
Send us Ivan, nevermore
At first light, rain still was fallin’
With phone lines down, there was no callin’
It’s over now, so quit your bawlin’
The tear’s won’t help your swab your fetid floor.
Start the cleanup, it’s your chore,
Send us Ivan, nevermore.
Across the roads, lay many a tree and
It took chainsaws, to set us free, and
Regrowing those trees, will take an eon
Pensacola was ripped to its very core.
Wall of water, ocean roar,
Send us Ivan, nevermore.
T hen, on Christmas Day, two thousand four
An earthquake raised the ocean floor
A tsunami raced toward island shore
Creating Oceana hell.
Like what happened the day the towers fell
For thousands dead, we toll our bell.
Day after day, we watched the tele show
The total dead, we’ll never know
Worse than our little bitty Ivan blow
That on land run day fell.
For decades hence the tale we’ll tell
And for the total dead, we’ll toll our bell.
So when you cry for shingles lost
And sheetrock wet, that you have tossed
And replacement things that bring you cost
Please count me out; that bridge I’ve crossed.
Cause crying makes you seem like a little bitty bore
When no children from your arms by waves were ever tore
We lukily lose the total gore, comparative score.
I count my blessings, fate, and therefore evermore
I’ll whine about ol’ Ivan forever, nevermore.
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